This will be dusty, so use a big bowl.
Heat oven to 180 degrees. Butter a cake form (2 litres size), dust it with flour and put it in the fridge.
Sieve 300g wheat flour (I used medium white), 2 teaspoons of baking powder, 1 teaspoon of baking soda and one teaspoon of cacao powder into a big bowl. Add 100g of ground almonds, 150g brown sugar, and one teaspoon mixed spices for Lebkuchen. (The latter is a mix of cinnamon, star anise, cloves, aniseed, mace, coriander, ginger, nutmeg and cardamon.) Mix well with a spoon. Add a tablespoon of rum, and 80g vegetable oil. Mix well. The result will be not really a dough, more like dust clotting together in soft clumps, but that's OK.
Peel 500g of tart apples, quarter, cut out core and flower, grate. (No need to grate it finely.) Knead it into the dough to create a heavy, solid-ish, damp mix. I used the electrical mixer, went perfectly, took less then two minutes.
Put dough in form, put in oven, bake for 50 to 60 minutes. (More like 60 in my oven.) Take out, let cool on a grate, then wrap in tinfoil for storage.
This might be even better after three days storage, but it didn't get the opportunity to do so. We ate the whole loaf with five people. Fresh salted butter might go fine with it, too.
I have some difficulties with our current RPG campaign, because our characters are arrogant, super-powered, young aristocrats (Exalted DragonBlooded, to be exact), and my normal mode of play is sneaky, understated and diplomatic. Now we have to extract tribute from a barbarian chieftain, and realistically we can offer him neither trade nor threats -- we have nothing, and the army post we are stationed in is a joke. We can, however, lie, bluff, promise, cajole, bullshit, trick, or scam, to our hearts' content. My character is good with people, so I designed a performance which will, if luck is with us, dazzle the chieftain and make him want to throw his lot in with the biggest bully on the bloc as quickly as he can.
No idea if it will work, but it was fun to make up.